by Almé Hugo
Nestled at the end of Victoria street sits Bohemia’s contemporary, The Mystic Boer. A place filled with alcohol, debauchery and a winding staircase leading to more alcohol and debauchery. Mystical and magical.
At least, it used to be. “Mystics” regulars left Stellenbosch at the end of 2023 not knowing that they would never see the Boer again. The Mystic Boer announced its departure on 10 January via their Instagram page. Comments such as “This is so depressing,” and “Julle maak my baie sad, neh,” show that they will indeed be missed.
However, as things go in this town of small business misadventures, a new “kuierplek” was promptly ushered in: Say hello to Punk. A slogan above the door promises “endless rebellion,” but patrons have yet to be convinced that the curtains match the drapes. Soulless black walls, stoic bartenders and lacklustre music indicates that Punk has not quite found its unique voice in the Stellies club scene. It almost feels like Dorp, if Dorp had a light form of depression.
But it’s not all doom and gloom (unlike Punk’s interior). Drinks are reasonably priced, the dance floor remains spacious, and it seems like Punk has a few good events lined up to establish itself. One such event is a mural competition which promises to make the interior a bit more interesting. If you like Aandklas and Dorp, you are sure to enjoy Punk.
Although the mainstream alternative vibe is a popular one that accommodates a diverse patronage, it doesn’t feel like Punk adds much to the Stellenbosch club scene. Say what you will about the Mystic Boer — they had a stand-out identity and a dedicated customer base. As of yet, Punk still needs to find its spark. If it doesn’t, Stellenbosch is particularly cruel to unsuccessful businesses. Capitalism will show it the door if it doesn’t light up the floor.
The party-goers of Stellenbosch will put Punk to the test. Until then, rest in peace, Mystics. May you enter the gates of Vodka-Valhalla and be greeted by legends such as Entourage and Tin Roof. We salute you. As one commenter on Mystics’ Instagram put it: “Cheers to all the memories, even those we don’t remember.”
