I never thought I’d be the type of girl who writes anonymous letters to newspapers in search of the perfect date.
If you’re on campus and check all my listed boxes, you know what to do.
I am looking for a guy who is super insecure. He must be emotionally unavailable and must also get jealous easily when I even stand too close to another man.
When I open up his phone gallery, I want to see at least 50 recent pics of him flexing, nothing boosts a man’s ego than taking half-naked selfies and keeping them to look at on rainy days.
Also, a fun fact about me, I like to plaster my face with makeup in my spare time, and take selfies in my bikini in the middle of winter.
Clearly, I’m banking on your sense of humor being as ridiculous as mine.